What is Thanatophobia? Phobia of Losing Someone You Love | Fear of losing someone, Phobia words, Losing someoneFear of losing loved ones – Can't you stop worrying? Are you afraid to lose loved ones always in your mind? Are you worried about losing a , or a partner dying? Are you afraid to lose normal loved ones? Yeah, it's normal not to want people we love to die. We enjoyed your company, and we know that life would be very different without them. We don't talk enough about death in modern culture either. So there may be a certain amount of fear simply because we don't fully know what we'd be dealing with. He coined a fear of death and death, '' and felt that we all suffered from it because we refused to accept our mortality. Modern psychologists call this common fear "extreme of death." He coined a fear of death and death, '' and felt that we all suffered from it because we refused to accept our mortality. Modern psychologists call this common fear "extreme of death." A healthy or unhealthy fear? A normal fear of loss implies and when we think of our loved ones in motion, followed by an understanding is an inevitable fact of life. It can mean a moment past considering our own mortality. But in general, we realize that we would face it. An unhealthy fear of losing loved ones is more like growing anxiety, and comes with. We feel that our life would end without the other person. An unhealthy fear of losing loved ones is more like growing anxiety, and comes with. We feel that our life would end without the other person. The more we think of losing the loved one in question, the worse we feel. start, which may include: What is fear under fear? By: Loss of a loved one is an easy thing to put all our concerns into because it is an acceptable anxiety. So sometimes we use the fear of losing loved ones to hide other fears that we are more, such as the fear of: Why is it so important to admit these 'fears under fear'? They're easier to treat. We can't stop other people around us one day dying. But we can find support to learn new ways of being, and take steps forward so that we no longer feel overwhelmed by the idea of being responsible for sailing our own life. We can't stop other people around us one day dying. But we can find support to learn new ways of being, and take steps forward so that we no longer feel overwhelmed by the idea of being responsible for sailing our own life. Fear of losing loved ones and codependentness Fear of losing loved ones can hide a problem with codependentness. implies taking your and someone else, instead of developing it inside. If you are in a codependent relationship you will feel that it is your responsibility to constantly make the other happy person, and that you do not know who you are without them. If you are in a codependent relationship you will feel that it is your responsibility to constantly make the other happy person, and that you do not know who you are without them. Despite telling yourself that you simply "really love" the other person, it is not a . It leaves you unable to see all your personal power. Allowing you out and being independent can make a real difference. But codependentness can also be a very powerful pattern, and you may need to and learn to. How can I stop worrying about losing a loved one? Proving totally or worries tend to go back, and we end up thinking about the issue more than ever. So the first step can be. Accept that you are about to lose a loved one. Then try the following: 1. Make a list of all your concerns. Anxiety is powerful because it feels out of control, sending our . But if we take the time to sit and write on paper what is behind anxiety? Our life may be less out of control than we think. What are the worst things that would happen if you lost your loved one? You wouldn't have a place to live with, or who to talk to? What are the possible solutions for each problem? 2. Identify what you've already lost. You could be more than you realize. Loss is part of life and it is likely that some have already successfully navigated, and come on the other side. Writing things you really valued that you lost, whether it was a childhood that went away, or having to graduate from one you liked to be. See if you can remember what you did to navigate that loss and bounce. 3. Practice consciousness. is a technique to help you stay in, instead of losing yourself for concerns about a future you can control and a past you can't change. We can do what's right in front of us. Read our easy-to-do '' and start practicing as soon as today. 4. Learn about death and death. The main cities now have what is known as '. These are encounters for people to come and discuss their fears of death and die with a "Doula de la muerte", someone who understands the process. Even simple things like learning how a funeral is arranged and can demystify the process that we all face at some point. Visit a coffee of death, read about other people's experiences, or ask people who know who's been through a duel to share their story. 5. Talk about your fear with other supporters. You might want to share anxiety with your loved one. If this seems like a bad idea, try a trusted friend or family member. Would no one understand your anxiety about losing a loved one? Then talk to a counselor. Your school may have if you are a student, or your might provide several free sessions. If you are over 18 years old, you can book private advice, with . Do you need adequate help with your fear outside the control of losing a loved one? We connect you with the best speech therapists in London. Or you use to find and you can talk from anywhere. Do you still have a question about your fear of losing loved ones? Do you want to share your experience with other readers? Next. Note that comments are moderate to protect our readers, and we do not allow aggressive or inflammatory content. Related posts Want a question about this toPIC? If you are a journalist writing about this topic, contact him - we can comment or provide a shooter appointment from a professional therapist. Yes, I am a journalist Click here to confirm that you are a journalist I am an average teenager. I think I can have anxiety and depression but I can't tell my parents because well... they're African and they don't believe in such a condition. Yesterday I found out that one of my elders had died in a car accident. I tried to accept it. I talked to my friends and they told me wise words and I tried to remember that death is inevitable but I don't know... my heart won't take it. I tried to sleep yesterday but I still felt this numbness and coldness in my feet, my heart was beating very fast and I couldn't sleep. The same happened when Juice Wrld was dead. I didn't know him or anything. I wasn't really a fan, but it still hit me hard... This old man wasn't my friend either. I didn't know her that well, but the pain is still there... I was 16... I think I need help but I can't tell my parents like I said before. Every time I talk about problems like this... or they tell me to sleep or drink water... I don't have any money either. . But please help me. I have an exam coming and I don't want these feelings to get in the way of my studies. Please help. This kind of anxiety about death and death is very common in adolescents. First, your brain is growing and flooded with hormones, which means that many teenagers have mood problems. So it's time for life when you're beginning to think of a future where you have to be in control of your own destiny and away from your parents and find your identity. And death can become an interest or obsession because there is a sense of going out into the world, of not always being able to depend on everything and of all being there or staying the same. As the article suggests, it may be useful to investigate death. Accept it like any other research, like you're writing a rehearsal. If you have a friend who is interested, or who is also upset by the student who died, see if talking about death and death helps. If your school offers some kind of support for the penalty, take them on the offer. In short, you are a sensitive person who cares about others. It's normal to be upset if someone you respect dies. The thing is simply to feel emotions instead of resisting and judging you. Like then you end up with anxiety about anxiety itself. Better, HTI is a 15-year-old. And I'm afraid of losing my family because they've always been there when I've been sad. especially my grandfather, he's always been my best friend and I can't think of a life without him or anyone else in my family. How can I stop thinking about losing them? I'm 24 years old. I think it was a little immature to make decisions about my career in my school and college life. I had family problems too. I lost my father when I was one. And I lost 2-3 people I loved most, because they used to take care of me. Now, I feel that no one can understand me and no one listens to me when I try to talk about my fears. I can't sleep at night even if I'm tired. I don't understand what I'm gonna do in my life. Every time I feel negative, I meditate, I even exercise, but I can't concentrate on my career. I feel so worried and tense. Please help. Thank you. Hi Vinne, it's really normal to start worrying about losing loved ones like a teenager. It's the point of life where you realize that soon you have to be an adult, take care of yourself, and start to realize that life can be a challenge and not everything lasts forever. So, first of all, it's okay to have these concerns. Then concentrate on enjoying time with your family when you are with them, then develop your resources as a person, learn to take care of yourself and become independent. Otherwise you can find the learning of the mind helps, as well as the practice of gratitude, training your mind not to obsess with just the bad but also recognize what is going well in life. Better, HTHi Nidhi, we feel that the way young people are forced to make huge decisions about their future is quite backward. When we're 18-20 we don't really know each other well. But because of that, being totally insecure about your career and future at 24 is actually normal. You'd be surprised how many people feel like that. And you could be trapped in black and white thinking. This is where everything is good. Life is not that. You are always free to change your mind and find other options. Many people these days change their career several times, it's normal. But this aside, it seems to have spread anxiety. Which means logic won't help as your mind is trapped in cognitive distortion loops. We highly recommend CBT therapy, a short form of therapy that does not deepen in the past but helps you to control your thoughts so that you are constantly spiraling into the lower moods. Better, HT. Hey, I just wanted to say thank you. This article, as well as a couple of others, has been very open to me. 'Fear under Fear'... I would never have noticed that on my own. However, I can now take the necessary measures. Thanks again. You made a big difference in my life! Wonderful to listen. It makes it all worth knowing that it helps others. Andrea (the editor and lead writer who wrote this piece). I started to feel anxious in the mid-20s. Now it has become a debilitating struggle. My mother has never been a healthy woman and I agony almost every free moment I have for myself. I have to stay busy or I can't stand it. I put the overwhelming nostalgia to the point that I literally can't get away from myself, if that makes sense. My wife knows a bit about what happened to the depression I knew but I can never put in words how I feel. I've seen a couple of different therapists who say death is natural. Yeah, I know. Everyone dies. It's the overwhelming dissociation I get when I think about it. I can't stop. I'm scared, Michael. Is that what all the therapists say? We're curious. As we imagined a good therapist would focus on fear, where it comes from, and help you get into fear and explore it instead of getting away from it. You say you've seen "a couple of different therapists." That's of interest to us. How long did you stay with each other? Is there any possibility that your anxiety is sabotaged any deep work and that you get out of therapist to therapist (which tends to not produce results). As we feel a problem of intimacy. For example, you don't feel understood or able to communicate completely with your own wife. This type of problem leads to the failure to give any therapist a proper opportunity. On the other hand, they could have been the wrong therapist. In any case, we don't think this is about death. It's just that you have a strong anxiety and it looks at death. It is more likely that your anxiety is derived from another place, an assumption might be the relationship and attachment to your mother and then difficult childhood experiences. In any case. It could be worth looking at CBT therapy, which does not look at its past at all, but is a short-term therapy to help stop its thinking and has been shown to be less anxiety. Since deep diving therapy is going to be less effective until your anxiety calms down a bit. If there was any childhood trauma, look at EMDR. Hypnotherapy could be useful, and consider starting a care practice that needs commitment but is easy to learn, free, and over time is very powerful for anxiety and stress. Finally, use the search bar to find our articles on fear of death, we believe you will find them useful. Better, HT. Your fear of a loved one who dies article is interesting to me because I felt this, but not to people. I have lost several very special pets, very dear, both dogs and cats, recently. Now I have an 18-year-old cat. I'm still crying because she's gonna die sometimes soon. She's the oldest furbaby I've had the luck of having, and the thought of her next death is very sad. I also saw on a pet loss page that others also feel this way. Any suggestion you might have would be very welcome to those of us who consider furbabies to be more family than pets. I'm a 15-year-old teenager and one of my best friends died two years ago for suicide. It was very difficult for me to deal with it and it took me two years, but I still feel the pain. Now when my friends tell me they're sad or/and depressed, I can't help but think they can take their lives too. I try to think they won't, as they told me they won't, but my mind won't stop questioning whether or not they will. I tried to talk to my friends and my mother, and they helped, but at the end of the day the feeling and anxiety that never comes out. This feeling is ruining me inside and I feel as scared Tia, it definitely sounds like you've developed anxiety. The mind can be trapped in negative thinking loops and then it can affect our moods and our ability to cope in a daily way. Is there anyone I can talk to outside the situation? Does your school provide advice? Would your mother be willing to help you see a counselor? It might be useful to find someone who takes care of the pain. Otherwise there is a type of short-term therapy called CBT that focuses only on helping you stop your thoughts from being negative and getting out of control. It has been shown to help with anxiety. If you are in the UK, you can talk to your GP and can also refer to you for free support (although there may be really long waiting lists). Better, HT. Helen, pets are sensitive creatures, who give and receive so much love. Many of us experience a very real pain when we lose a dear pet. It sounds as if you were pre-grier, what happens, as much as when a loved human is sick and we know that his death is ahead. We would say to take the article and use your tips, as all the tips are applied mainly to know that you will lose a pet too! Better, HT. I'm afraid that my partner will die of a long sudden illness or just go out to work and never go through an accident again, it's getting worse that I see his death in my head that I think would take my own life if he died, I know it sounds selfish but I can't stand it anymore... Hey, Lindsey, you look like you have anxiety. Anxiety can be fixed on one thing, like the person we love most. This kind of anxiety can also be related to anxious attachment, a way to relate that we learn as a child and then bring into our adult relationships. Would you consider talking to a counselor about this? That would be a good idea. You can even talk to your GP that you can recommend for NHS-funded therapy, although waiting lists can be very long in certain areas. Better, HT. I'm 17 years old. I'm afraid of losing my mother because she's my life. I can't imagine a life without her. I love her so much but my fear of losing her keeps me sad and I can't help thinking about it and keeps me sad. Please help. Syeda is actually quite normal to be afraid of losing your parents as a teenager. It is a time in life when you realize that you will soon have to be independent and an adult and go out and create your own life, and decide who you are. Sometimes the fear of losing parents is also the fear of having to be an adult like them and no longer a child. And when we realize that we have to become our own person soon, we feel vulnerable, and then we realize that nothing is forever, not childhood, or not our parents. So there can be a mourning process. It may be useful to take time every day to remember what is happening in the present, here and now. Things like daily gratitude can really help. As you can learn the mind. And also learn about balanced thought. If your thoughts become really erratic to the point that your everyday life is affecting, you may have anxiety, and it is a good idea to talk to a counselor. Better, HT. I'm a 65-year-old woman with no one. I have 2 children in his 20. They are the loves of my life – but they have their own lives. My sister means more to me than anyone I have except for my two children. I feel like she's the only person I've been around that really cares about me and my life. When she dies, I can't imagine living without her love anymore. I don't know how people keep living without at least 1 person who cares about them. I don't think I can. I need someone who believes in me and cares. I'm not having that. I don't know if I want to be a person who can go alone without anyone who cares about me and my side every day. Hi, Maria, we have a lot of familyless customers, totally alone, and they struggle, especially if they never developed intimate links before as they were not taught to do so. It sounds like at this point that you really have people in your life that you're tied to, but your worries and anxiety about the future are blocking your ability to enjoy what you have. Our question to you is, do you believe in yourself? Do you mind? If not, where does this disconnect come from? Are you able to make new friends? If not, what's stopping you? And would you be willing, even now, to gather your courage and develop a relationship with yourself? What, in our opinion, is the most important of all, and it is never too late to work on? It's just once we really feel happy with our own company that we can feel safe in the world and feel safe connecting with all those around us, including new friends. We would advise you of some kind of advice to address this level of concern and disconnection of yourself. We also have clients who got married again in their seventies, or developed new interests or social lives and were surprised. Until then, you might want to learn the attention that helps you stay in the present. Better, HT. Hi, I lost my father to suicide when I was 11. I am now 21 years old and I am always anxious for my mother to die (and other family members – for example, aunts). I've always been worried about this for a long time, but it seems to be getting worse to the point that I'm thinking too much about it (and how I couldn't deal with it without it). I'm a only child I think makes this fear worse. I don't know how to stop this irrational thought. Hi. Have you ever talked to anyone about all this? A professional? That's a lot so it's not surprising that you have anxiety. You see that it is really normal when it is transferred to the independence of adults to have anxiety about parents who die. We see it in many young adults. Being a teenager is the time we explore who we are outside of those around us, which means we also have to face the fact that we are separated, and that those around us are not forever. And getting out on our own and being independent also makes us realize and that we can't trust anyone to always be there and have to learn to depend on ourselves. This normal processing could be much harder for you simply because of such sudden loss. We'd say it's worth talking to someone. As for 'coupling', resistance often makes things worse. What about accepting it? Right now, at this time of your life, things seem scared. And that's good. Right now, you have thoughts that are irrational. And that's good too. It's thoughts, not who you are. Right now you're worried that you can't face it without someone else. But in fact you've already proven that you can face and continue without others. Focus on every day, and not panic at thoughts, and reach support. Better, HT. Hello, thank you for this pleasant reading or provided. It was very useful and I felt calm and I understood that he was the ruler of law. I've just turned 20 today and I realize that I really am afraid of loss in relationships. Fear is unfortunately enormous. I always imagine my girlfriend dating another guy (a simily situation happened once and I felt really bad. Maybe I've developed a destructive defense mechanism. Although she loves me and I am aware of that (most of the time), she was still afraid to lose her, sometimes in a really harmful way. What can I do? Thanks for your help. It will be very useful. All right! (I want to accept the fact that it could happen and accept the thing with the last time... That's my goal. Hi Kasra, it's a good target, acceptance. The problem with acceptance is that it is much easier to say than to do it. Sometimes what we need to accept is our discomfort. What if it's okay to be afraid of losing someone? If it's okay to have negative thoughts about what might happen? Can you accept that you have these thoughts, and then continue, independently? And recognize that you are not your thought? Are those thoughts just thoughts? Also be aware that 20 years is a common age to have this kind of fear, it is the age that moves towards the independence of your family. And the more you must trust yourself, the more you must realize that nothing is forever. As for this other situation, yes, it could be coloring this new relationship. But we imagine it goes much deeper than that. What did you learn about love and relationships growing for example? And how is your self-esteem? As for self-help tools, we would really recommend attention. We have a free guide here Better, HTEven although life is completely at this time, I can really not stop thinking randomly about loved ones dying and then get randomly anxiety from it, help.. I hate this feeling so much more I think about it, the more I want to cry, I don't want to cry. Hello Charlotte, it's a strange moment in the world, many people feel anxious and have negative thoughts. Try to calm down. It is also good to cry from time to time, it can be cathartic and useful. Better, HT. I'm afraid of losing my mother. I'm 15 years old. I really fear it deeply, as if I were in bed sobbing at 12 am thinking of how life will be without it and I get physical chest pains for pain I can't live without her. I'm scared every time she gets out or feels sick and I always want to be with her or her side I am very attached to her and physically it hurts me to think of her death and I think of her death often and I don't know what to do because I know that if I lose her, I will lose It makes me think of my chest, head and heart I really feel lost I don't know anymore. I want to die before I die and leave I can't live without her. What's wrong with me? Hi. We cannot make a diagnosis based on a comment, we do not know it or the whole situation. It's normal for teenagers to worry about their parents dying as they are expected to become independent and this can cause anxiety. But it sounds like you depend on your Mother and have severe anxiety. Do you have friends and a social life? Or your own interests? What kind of relationship have you had growing up with your Mother? Was she dependent on you? Or does it prevent you from having your own life? Does she control your life? These are things you look at with a counselor or therapist. Is there anyone you can talk to about this? Could you find support? Thank you so much! I have stopped worrying about losing loved ones, thanks to your advice! I have also tried to meditate well on the works! I'm glad to be of help! Please help me, I just kept thinking about the death of my family member especially my mother. I'm afraid of going anywhere without her, and I don't want them to know. I usually cry at night when I think about it, started when it was 4th grade. Like the last comment here, that's exactly how I feel. I'm also 15, is that normal? I'm scaring Ron Lol. Hi, Jlna, we don't like the word 'normal'. There is really no 'normal'. Everyone has their own problems, whether obvious or not. We're all people doing the best we can. We can't really say we need to meet you and your story, but it looks like you have anxiety. Anxiety makes our brain trust one thing, and for you are people you want to die to. As you love your mother more, she's the one you focus most on. And we figured there might also be some family problems, since you don't even feel like you can talk to your family openly about this. It's a good idea to look for support on this. Is there a school counselor to talk to? Or could you suggest to your mother that you feel anxious and want to talk to someone, without having to explain everything? And could you help you find a counselor? We have an article on how to talk to your parents about mental health. Better, HT.hi, I'm afraid of losing my family. It started when last month, one of my best friends lost her father at night because of the heart attack. And since then I can't sleep well at night, I always cared for my family and in the morning when I wake up, I call them if they're healthy. I always have these thoughts when someone died around me. But it was usually 2-3 days, but now it's been 1 month and still continues. Maybe the reason for that is that my parents friends usually died because of the heart attack. And a doctor and working in an epidemic hospital right now and seeing covid cases makes me worse at all. Because my mother was a breast cancer and my father has a COPD, so I was worried about it and it makes me OCD, sanitized all three times, not literally going out except groceries, to protect them to get infected. And these thoughts really make me so exhausted. I can't get rid of these ideas and I don't know what to do if this happens. I'm afraid I miss them so much, not anything else I've lost them I can't get over it, though I think I'm starting to cry and I really don't know how to handle this... Darcy, it sounds like anxiety disorder. We can't be sure, obviously we can't diagnose on the basis of a comment, but as a doctor, we're sure I'd tell someone with physical symptoms to get support. We advise you very much given these mental symptoms to get support. Anxiety chooses one thing to overcome obsessively, and your mind has settled in the death of your friend's father. In addition, it is hardly surprising that you have developed anxiety, being a doctor during Covid is incredibly stressful and there has been an increase in anxiety and depression among health workers that some places were offering free therapy in the United Kingdom to health workers early in the year. In fact, what is stressing you most might be work, anxiety tends to find something out of the main problem to obsess. Does your workplace provide any mental health support? If they do, take it. Otherwise, is there another way to access the support? Skype therapy is very good for anxiety and does not imply leaving home or endangering the health of your parents. Don't feel like you're "debted" to have this crisis, it would honestly be much more worrying, like a doctor who deals with the pandemic, if you don't have mental health symptoms. It's actually. a healthy response to a very unhealthy and foolish situation, the way your mind gets to know your stress limits. Once again, contact a little support. Self-help methods to study include attention (there are some easy-to-follow applications that can help) and stress breathing exercises, many videos on YouTube. Be nice to yourself, you're sailing a lot. But don't fool yourself to think that self-help is enough, look for support. We know how to care that the last person we can give care can be ourselves. Try not to fall into that trap. We help others better if we help each other first. Better, HT. Hi, my name's Emma. I'm really afraid to loo my mother, I'm 13 Evaytime who's leaving home, I'm very upset about panic attacks. I always need to be with her when she's in public, I feel like she's gonna go out and get in an accident and never come back. Or I feel like they're gonna shoot him or something. I can't talk to my friends abt it bc who don't take it seriously, and my mom says it's gonna be okay, but she doesn't know. Hi, Emma, when we enter the phase we realize that we will have to be in charge of our lives and be independent, we can start panicking about the people we have always trusted. Many teenagers go through a phase of realizing that their parents will die one day and then they will be really scared. But if you have anxiety, your anxiety can focus on this fear and make it so big that it begins to make the day to day faces hard. We think it would be great if you had someone to talk to about this, out of the situation. Is there a school counselor you'd be comfortable talking to? If not, would you feel comfortable telling your parents that you feel anxious and would like to talk to someone, counselor or therapist? We have an article on how to raise mental health with your parents here. If you are in the UK, you can also talk to your GP that can then refer to someone. There are also free help lines for teens, you can find the UK here. If you are not in the UK, google for one near you. Better, HT. Hi. I'm afraid of losing my loved ones, specifically my parents. I don't know what to do when I lose them. It makes my day so sad thinking about it. It started about 3 months ago because of a tattoo that died. It got worse when our favorite Youtuber died because we watch their videos every day. I really don't know if we'll meet in the later life or after life would be a very dark and gloomy place. It really bothers me when I sleep. It makes me feel very uncomfortable. It makes me cry when I think of this. I've already lost several relatives and friends, and that makes my heart cry. I don't want to lose my family because they play a big part in my life. Even though when I grow up, having my own family, I will truly miss them, as they are the ones who shaped my mind, they made me stronger and smarter, more disciplined, and taught me everything I can apply using it in the future. As the youngest of the family, it makes me feel very sad because I will be the only one left if your time comes. As a Christian, I really hope the sky is real so we can meet and have a wonderful and happier life up there, but what if the Bible said there will be an eternal life in heaven? What will happen to the gift of eternal life? I really hope that I can accept this because I can't have a regular time of sleep, it scares me when I can't see them; as if they go out, travel places, or they're just in their room, and it really makes my emotions mix when they don't feel well especially in this pandemic time. I think that, in the future, when I really have a family, I would understand these situations and also accept that life is temporary. I hope this commentary will raise your attention. I'm still 12 years old on 13th 27th and I'm a 7th grade student. To the people out there, Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and have a good day ahead! 😉Hi Benjamin. As you'll see in some of our other answers, it's actually normal to start worrying about your loved ones dying when you're a teenager. It is the part of life that you begin to realize that you will soon be independent, and that you are mortal, and that one day you will lose all. It's a lot of digesting and taking time, but it's a normal part of our social development. Have you talked to your family about these concerns? Or do you have a trusted person you can discuss death and die with? They are useful topics to learn and discuss how they are an inevitable part of life. If you find your concern bigger and bigger, and that you have other symptoms that match anxiety, it might be worth talking to a counselor. Better, HT. Hello... I'm a 50-year-old, early to be 51. Latley I think of my mother, thank God I still have my parents, my mom is 84 and he's health goes down the hill, and it's been really bothering me, I don't know why it seems to me to bottle, when I talk to my father, I know it's coming soon, but I'm so scared how it's gonna deal with this. I can't deal with the fact that you leave a day.. I'm gonna hit hard.. Please help me understand this... Hi Pamela, unfortunately we cannot help you understand it based on a comment, as you, like all of us, are a complex person composed of a life of experiences. As the article speaks, there may be so many reasons why we are anxious for a person to die, for fear of our own mortality, to some kind of relationship with that person. But since you're causing such anxiety, why not find someone who can help you understand it? A chat therapist could create a safe and non-critical space for you to see this topic and perhaps the other topics that arise connected to it. So if you could gather your courage and find someone to talk to, we'd advise. If you are in a tight budget, here in the UK you can talk to your GP and may refer to you for conversation therapy, although there may be a time to wait. Better, HT. Hi, I'm 18 years old and currently I can't sleep for my anxiety, these past few years I've always been thinking of losing my loved ones especially to my little family, I can't imagine my life without them, and I'm serious. Every night, when I go to sleep, I think about it and end up thinking about something else to distract me or like tonight, when nothing can distract me and I just decide to jump my sleep. Honestly, I'm sick of it, these thoughts are hunting my head, and I would love to result in this situation but being an introverted person I find it difficult to talk about my problems especially "not material." Help me! LookHi Look, if you read through the other comments here in this article, you'll find that you're not alone, and we're talking about how this is a normal thing that happens when a teenager realizes your own mortality and you soon have to go out on your own in the world. We recommend that you see this anxiety so serious even if it is not physical and that you talk to someone, introverted or not. Is there a school counselor? A friend or relative you trust? Talking about these things with a trusted person can help you feel less alone and can make a world of difference. better, HT. Hi,Iost my parents to illness when I was very young,I miss them so much I hope God is keeping them,Please help me through the pain. Hey, Bernard, it sounds tough. This type of emotional pain that has not gone on your own deserves proper attention, not some random comment from a blog team. We advise you to see the help of a professional counselor or therapist. If you are in a low budget, use our article on low-cost counselling for inspiration. Better, HT. Hi, I'll be 20 in a couple of days soon. I have basically experienced many difficult things at a very young age. I've lost 4 close friends in the last 3 years. 2 of them died due to suicide, one in a car accident and the last drowned will try to cool off on a hot summer day. I was there with my friend when he drowned and it was the hardest thing I had to see. I felt so helpless, we all tried to save him, but the current was too strong. It was only in the early 20s. It was tearing. Since that day I've had a terrible fear of water. I love to swim but now I get into instant panic, I scare and lose all control of myself. I'm afraid of drowning, and I think it's all related to what happened to my friend. My uncle died suddenly five months ago for a heart attack. I was so healthy, so full of life, always telling me to stay positive and to stick to my nursing course I'm studying at college. Suddenly he took me off and I don't think I can give him the head. I have witnessed so much death and loss during the years that I thought I would be able to undress him or even get used to the feeling as horrible as that sound, but I feel this has been the worst loss so far. I've never told anyone this and I feel comfortable saying this now because you don't know who I am, but please give me any advice you can. Thanks for taking the time to read this, I appreciate it. Hi HD. That's a lot for a person. Anxiety really feels a normal response considering. Your brain is overwhelmed and trying to protect you. Pain is a strange beast. It takes a lot of time to process, and it comes with many symptoms that you would probably recognize if you read some of our articles about loss and pain. And it's often a very, very good idea to seek support. Is there any reason you haven't spoken to a mourning counselor? Most universities now offer free low-cost advice, too, we advise you to take advantage of what is on offer. Gather your courage and seek support. It is a sign of strength, to be brave enough to seek support and care for ourselves, rather than any idea of trying to 'be' only that tends to mean that we suffer much more and more. In an additional note, if your fear of water is not clarified after the advice, you may want to test the clinical hypnotherapy or the EMDR, which can deal directly with anxiety and fear around a traumatic event clearly defined as what you lived. better, HT. Hello I am 15 years old, and I have been receiving frequent thoughts about my loved ones dying (especially my mother). I try to stop them because I think thinking about things makes them more likely to happen, but it doesn't help and thinking becomes more and more frequent. I don't think I have a codependency problem or anything, but I'm worried and I don't want anything to happen to my parents because I really love them.How can I relieve these thoughts and stop thinking about them? Thank you for your help :) Hello Isabella, if you have a reading of all the other comments you will see that you are far from being alone with all this and it is very common for teenagers to start panic one day losing their parents. You are at a time in your life where you realize that soon you have to be independent and fend for yourself. And you're developing your individual identity that will take you through life and do things about mortality. Trying to stop thinking never actually works is counterproductive, thoughts tend to become stronger. It's best to talk about this. Why not talk to your mom about how you realized that nothing is forever and it makes you sad that one day you're an adult alone and not there? All of us, all of us human of all ages, feel sad to consider that we will lose loved ones, but all of us, each of us will. It's part of life, less spoken in Western culture than in other countries, but something healthy than talking about. (Use our search bar to find our article on Death Anxiety, it will also be useful) Or talk to friends or relatives who might have similar thoughts. You could find a useful diary. And it's a good idea to talk to a school counselor, too, who would understand a lot. Again, death and loss is part of life. As a teenager we started to realize that, and browsing these realizations is a normal part of growing up. Better, HT. Hello, an architecture student and my father died suddenly because of a heart attack a few months ago. I have immense pressure on work, but it seems to escape through worry, procrastination, crying and awake sleep. I'm afraid I can't fulfill your dreams. I cannot focus on my tasks properly, fear the death of those around me as well. I have terrible nightmares that often see him and wake up to realize he's not here, many days I depressed with nightmares and anxious sleep. Hi, Amy, believe it or not these are normal symptoms of pain. You need to go read or articles about pain and grief. Is there an advisory service at your school? Or do you have access to mourning counseling? Also consider joining forums where you can touch the base with others who currently deal with a loss. And calm down. Grief takes a long time to pass. Lower your expectations. Sounds like you're too hard on yourself, you're just a student with your life ahead of you and you're already worried about making dreams, and it looks like the pain has only exacerbated this, so please look for that support. Better, HT. Thank you, thank you, thank you so much for this article. I was in the middle of one of many panic attacks caused by my mother's thought dying. It usually lasts more than an hour, but I got in 15 minutes this time. I'm 28 years old, but still very dependent on her and this helped me realize that my real fears were the ones you enumerated (not having their own identity, not knowing how to do things for myself, and feeling alone because I have perhaps a close friend). I lost my father as a child and I know how strong I am, but I need to find out who I am... Hi, Jane, that's a powerful realization! What could help you do that? Find out who you are? By the way, we have some identity articles that could help. About how to know your own thoughts and feelings. And I.D.s. Better, HT. I'm glad another sign here mentioned your pets. My cat's almost 16 years old, she's had it since she was a kitten. I don't have anyone else, just her and I agree with that, because she's my whole world that I love her so much. He's got kidney disease and I don't know how long we stayed together. I have often thought 'I go when it goes'. I can't imagine life without it, it's devastating and terrifying Hi Sharon, on the one hand, we understand it. Animals are so precious, and easier to love than other human beings like them ask less of us, are easier to understand, and can give as much affection without strings. But we worry when you say you don't have anyone else or you would want to die without your pet, as much as we love a person, a pet or even an object, this is an excessive dependence. What is the root of not having anyone else? Have you ever thought of seeking support on this, to see what prevents you from interacting with others? Better, HT. Thanks, HT. I think I was abused, definitely careless, as a child. Any subsequent relationship has been with the bullies. I kept them in my life I think because it's safe, since everything is known. I am referring to the provision of mental health where I am based as I have been going through a lot. I'm ready to face it. You're right about my dependence. The root cause is that she is the only one in my life that has shown me goodness. I don't want to go when she goes, but then I feel guilty saying that. I want to fight to continue, and not be so obsessed with how long we've left or lost it when it looks bad. I'm not sure how I stumbled into their articles, but I've already read dozens and they've been massively useful. Thank you. Hi, Sharon, we just want to say congratulations for having the courage to put you there to support you, it's always the first step that's harder. You're right. When we grow up in an abusive home, that is our idea of 'home', so we can naturally keep choosing it over and over again until we realize what is happening. Therapy really helps. What also helps is that it helps us to be more friendly and compassionate with ourselves. Often when we were abused and neglected without realizing it we took him to adulthood and in small ways they are constantly abusers and have been bad for ourselves. We don't take care of our health, we alienate, we don't follow our dreams, and those around us take our signal and treat us badly. The more we have compassion and goodness for ourselves, the more slowly we begin to meet with a different person. It's a long process that can be difficult, but it keeps putting one foot in front of the other. We're very happy that the site is helping. And again we really have that animals are sensitive beings that matter as much as other humans to many of us, and that is brutally painful when they move. But we also really think that she wouldn't want you to be unhappy without her, but she would be happier to know that you were okay when she moves. Animals can be like little guardian angels of another kingdom, but they want our well-being, so they find us. Better, HT. Thank you. HT, you have no idea how your understanding and comforting words have helped me already. I hope my psychological therapist is as kind as you are. Sometimes I look forward to the future, instead of being afraid. Thanks again. Hi. I'm a 21-year-old female and for a couple of years I've been so afraid of dying my mother and losing my boyfriend too. Because in the last two years, she's become my best friend. I love her so much. I feel like she's my age and not my mother, we'd really be the best friends. But I also feel a little dependent on her, I think, I'm not much more but since I was younger I did a lot for myself and I didn't see myself as independent until I was 18. Now I feel terrified about what life will be without it, because I really love her more than anything in the world. The pain would be so painful. I also feel this way for my boyfriend and I worry that I'm becoming codependent on him; we have a healthy relationship so it's not like we'll end soon or nothing is just that when I'm on my own I usually feel good but when I'm with him and he lets me get sad and anxious about what I'll feel uncomfortable about myself, and although we've only been together almost a year sometimes I tell him It's so strong that it's almost too strong that it's too strong that I's too strong that I's too much that I'm thinking He is so sure of himself that I have the feeling that he thinks of course he would hurt if we weren't together, but he would still live. That makes me uncomfortable because I feel I wouldn't be able to cope without it, it feels like a true twin soul and I want to be more independent and I don't want to think about losing these 2 people. I think I have anxiety that makes it harder. Thank you. Hi Bambi, we also received your second comment. To be honest, we don't think you overreacted, there's some codependent going on here with your mother and your boyfriend. To some extent it is normal in young adults, who feed on a constant diet of false ideas of love and relationships of movies, etc. and who still do not have the life experience to know the reality is different. And they are in the process of being totally independent of their parents, and they are facing the reality of mortality. Therefore, you could naturally grow all of this as you age, live on your own if you are not already, etc. But also to say, to believe or not your boyfriend's attitude is very healthy. We do not know you and we cannot diagnose based on a comment. But it could be a matter of what is known as "I'm sorry." A person with safe attachment knows they are able to be good with or without the other person. What is healthy Love is not about losing without someone else, that is addiction and instability, love is to feel that the other person knows you and supports you to be your best me, but also to be able to be that better me with or without them. Love is not a basis for us to feel good, it is necessary, addiction, codependentness, low self-esteem. Love is an option to share and grow together (read our guide on healthy relationships for more). If we have what is known as "nervous attachment" relationships, they make us, well, anxious. (). It could also be an old anxiety, as you explain, but the question then becomes, where this anxiety comes from, what life experiences have led to it. Would you consider advice? That would be a great idea. If you're in college or college, they can offer free services at low cost, consult. Better, HT.i is a 14-year-old girl who is afraid of losing her little brother and sister. I can distinguish between a bit of fear and something worse. I feel that this is not something I'm going to get through and treat easily. I've never lost anyone closer to me than my grandfather, but it doesn't seem that's what's wrong, I'm not sure of anything and every time I have the opportunity to hold on to both of you and I'm very scared to let go (like holding my brothers hand for example or enjoying time with my sister and then she sleeping) I'm afraid something bad will happen if I fall asleep and feel the need to watch them all the time. sometimes disappears after a while but not recently. There's a very bad feeling that I have all the time and my chest feels so heavy that I don't know what to do. Nobody knows anything and I can't have them knowing. I know it's really stupid but I'm not sure of anything ever. Hey, Aarysa, we don't think it's stupid. What we think is that you're suffering from anxiety. Use our search bar to read our articles about it. Anxiety kidnaps our mind until we have increasingly illogical thoughts, and fix ourselves on one thing. Is there anyone you can talk to about this? An adult you trust, a school counselor? We don't know which country you're in. If you are in the UK, there are many resources for young people, such as the help lines you will find in this article. If not, google for a helpline in your area. And consider reading books on anxiety, there are many these days, with tips to help. Attention, for example, is very useful, you can learn for free here. Otherwise, could your parents be open to help you get some advice? We have an article on how to talk to your parents about mental health here. Better, HT. Reply Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *NameEmailInternet You currently have Javascript disabled. To post comments, make sure that JavaScript and Cookies are enabled, and reload the page. Find a Top Posts therapist Looking for something? Look for our hundreds of items here, we love to help! Last Tweet TopicsInstagram Feedharleytherapy About Harley Therapy Founded in 2006, we are an award-winning group that connects you to high-experience therapists in our London and online rooms around the world. Our mission is to improve emotional well-being through therapy and psychoeducation. The content is produced by editor and lead writer Andrea Blundell, trained in person-centered counseling, and supervised by retired senior therapist of BACP. VideosTerapiasLab Podcast A podcast dedicated to therapy, thought and well-being art! Dr. Sheri talks to distinguished guests about her childhood, psychological health problems and her experiences of therapy, good and bad. a how others have faced problems such as anxiety, depression, tear, OCD, and trauma and their advice to stay well. 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All you need to know about Thanatophobia What is Cheatophobia? Thanatophobia is commonly known as the fear of death. More specifically, it can be a fear of death or a fear of the death process. It's natural for someone to worry about their own health while ageing. It's also common for someone to worry about their friends and family after they've left. However, in some people, these concerns can become more problematic concerns and fears. American Psychiatry The association does not officially recognize cheatophobia as a disorder. On the other hand, the anxiety that someone may face because of this fear is often attributed to . Signs and symptoms of keatophobia include: Treatment focuses on:The symptoms of queatophobia may not be present all the time. In fact, you can only notice signs and symptoms of this fear when and if you start thinking about your death or the death of a loved one. The most common symptoms of this psychological condition are: When the episodes of queatophobia begin or get worse, you may also experience several emotional symptoms. These may include:Some people are more likely to develop a fear of death or experience fear of dying. These habits, behaviors, or personality factors may increase your risk of developing queatophobia: AgeDeath anxiety in a person's 20 years. It fades when they grow old. Men and women experience queatophobia in their 20 years. However, women experience one of the queatophobia in their 50s. Parents close to the end of life It has been suggested that older people experience queatophobia less often than younger people. However, older persons may fear the death process or lack of health. However, their children must fear death. They are also more likely to say that their parents are afraid to die because of their own feelings. Humility Less humble people must worry about their own death. People with higher levels of humility feel less self-important and are more willing to accept the journey of life. That means they're less likely to have death anxiety. Health Issues People with more physical health problems experience when considering their future. Thanatophobia is not a clinically recognized condition. There is no evidence that can help doctors diagnose this phobia. But a list of your symptoms will give doctors a better understanding of what you are experiencing. The official diagnosis will probably be anxiety. However, your doctor will notice that your anxiety stems from fear of death or death. Some people with anxiety symptoms experience more than 6 months. They may also experience fear or concern for other problems. Diagnosis of this wider anxiety disease can be generalized anxiety disorder. If the doctor is not sure of a diagnosis, you may refer to a mental doctor. This may include: If the mental doctor makes a diagnosis, they may also provide treatment for your condition. Treatment for anxiety and phobias such as thanatophobia focus on alleviating the fear and concern associated with this issue. To do this, your doctor can use one or more of these options: Conversation therapy Sharing what you experience with a therapist can help you better face your feelings. Your therapist will also help you learn ways to cope when these feelings happen. Cognitive behavioral therapy This type of treatment focuses on the creation of practical solutions to problems. The goal is to eventually change your pattern of thought and put your mind to taste when you face talking about death or death. Relaxation techniques, images and can help reduce physical symptoms of anxiety when they occur. Over time, these techniques can help you reduce your specific fears in general. Medications Your doctor may prescribe medications to reduce anxiety and feelings of panic that are common with phobias. However, medication is rarely a long-term solution. It can be used for a short period of time while you work to face your fear in therapy. To worry about your future, or the future of a loved one, is normal. While we can live in the moment and enjoy one another, the fear of death or death can still be worrying. If the worry is re-s scared or feels too extreme to handle on your own, look for help. A doctor or therapist can help you learn ways to cope with these feelings and how to redirect your feelings. If your concerns about death are related to a recent diagnosis or illness of a friend or family member, talking to someone about what you are experiencing can be helpful. Asking for help and learning how to manage these feelings and fears in a healthy way can help you manage your condition and prevent the potential to feel overwhelmed. Last medical review on August 28, 2019 Read this next set of words
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